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 1#Work At Something You Hate

In fact detest it, spend one third of your life getting paid for something that makes you sick to the pit of your stomach, feeling stressed, undervalued and unworthy! ‘Think’ change is not possible, just deal the hand you’ve been played and lump it.

2# Be Dishonest With Yourself

Tell yourself your something your not, become a criminal of your own mind: lie, cheat and be selective about what you share with the world including your own mis-givings and shortcomings, pull the wool firmly over your own eyes!

3# Be Dishonest With Others

Doesn’t matter why you do it, who cares if it’s a lack of confidence, attention seeking, hiding flaws and imperfections ‘competing’ with peers, to gain from others, just do it! It doesn’t matter that you’re ‘gonna be found out, you’ll cope, you can think up another lie.

4# Exist In a Relationship That Hold No Love

Stay in it: yeah, things may be well past their sell-by-date, wait a while, ‘hope’ and ‘wish’ things will get better, the time might come when it will be ‘right’ to end it, no point in fearing what’s going to happen at the end.

4.5# Have a Huge Gigantic EGO

Great! You’ll always be right, never lose face or be humiliated, it’s fun blaming others for your life, who cares if you aren’t perfect! Not you! You’ll never look like a fool, and take comfort in the fact that to provoke, prod and accuse other people will always make you look arrogant. No ‘dragons to slay’ huh?

5# Accept Nothing Less Than Perfectionism

Nothing is every going to be good enough for you so relax, you probably won’t get anything done, after all your best is just not good enough is it?

6# Ignore Your Finances (and Debt)

Yep, bury your head in the sand, everything will just blow on over.  The debt will disappear and doing nothing about your finances, that’s cool, they will sort themselves out.  Don’t look at them, don’t be in control of them, enjoy the fact that thinking about them leaves you hollow inside.

7# Adopt the Lone Ranger Syndrome

Saddle up and do everything by yourself.  Asking for help, support or advice isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be.  Forget that there will be someone in this world who has what you are looking for or can help you out.  Try not to ask for help, people always say no!

8# Listen to Others, Not Yourself

‘Does my bum look big in this?’, ‘what would you do?’, ‘what do you think’, ‘tell me what I should do?’, ‘oh, I never thought if that, yes, that’s better, I’ll do it your way’…at all times follow the opinions of others, you don’t know yourself that well (what you need, what you want and what your intuition is telling you.) Never listen to yourself, it’ll be wrong!

9# Don’t Look After Yourself OR Love Yourself

Try not look after yourself and for goodness don’t love yourself! That’s just to wishy-washy and airy-fairy.  You aren’t that important really, always put others before yourself it’s seen as less selfish, even if your ready to drop dead on your feet!

10# Go For Limiting Beliefs

Accept beliefs such as: ‘I must be liked and loved by everyone’ or ‘It’s too late for me to…’ or ‘I’ll never be able to…’ or ‘I’m not good/smart/clever/intelligent enough’ as the truth!   If you think they are true, they probably are and you’ll never be able to change them.

11# Blame Others Often

If it wasn’t for…my partner, my wife, my husband, the kids, the dog, the cat, the jobcentre, the careers advisor in high school, my ex boss, the place where I worked when I was 16, my looks, my feet, my education, my first love, my bank, the weather, my confidence, my self-esteem, my firing, my sacking, my training…whatever you want to use fill it in, it was probably was ALL their fault! Accept no responsibility and give up your control, people need to be blamed.

12# Live in the Past

Try not to let anything go, hold on to it tightly, those were the days, spend the next years of your life trying to replicate it, forget the fact that everything around you has changed.

13# Boredom

If boredom comes upon you, that’s fantastic.  Do nothing about it, declare to the world how bored you are, shove it on Facebook, notice how everyone comes and ‘unbores’ you. Put on the TV, eat, stick with what you know.

14# Only Negative Self Talk Permitted

Try and not talk to yourself positively, negative self talk is the only solution to belittling, berating, and destroying your confidence and self esteem! Watch out, you don’t want to mix positivity in there!

15# Be Around Put You Down People

Positive people are so annoying anyway! To not become one of ‘them’: surround yourself with the most negative people you know, agree with their negativity, join in if you can, have conversations about how terrible the world is.  If you start to enjoy it, leave, that defeats the purpose!

16# Give Up Too Soon

When things become a challenge or a little difficult, just stop. Give up when you can, no point in trying to go forward, you probably won’t make it anyway, save your energy for something else.

17# Mentally Beat Self to A Pulp

Whenever you can think about your mistakes from the past.  Try for as long as possible to dwell on them, feel what you felt then and continue to do this until you are in place of angst, crying is better.

18# Have No Emotional Control

There is no point on trying to manage your feelings.  Whenever the feelings arise, display them to the world.  Anger, jealousy, envy, rage are all great ones to keep other human beings away from you.

19# Guilt! Guilt! Guilt!

Try to hold onto as much guilt from the past as you can possible can.  Whatever you did (or didn’t do) is worth remembering. Even better (whenever you get the opportunity) make others feel guilty about what they did, go ahead and do it, it makes them feel awful but guilt is a great emotion to drudge up!

20# Take No Responsibility

Leave it to others, it’s easier that way.  Give it up, take on somewhat ‘child-like’ behaviour, it doesn’t matter all the action was yours, who cares, pass the buck.

21# Live By Others Instruction Manuals

Don’t create your own, just follow others ways of how the world it.

22# Don’t Take Any Risks

This is important.  Take no risks: never try anything new, don’t make yourself unsafe in anyway, people talk about pushing past comfort zones, stay in yours, life will just be the same and that’s perfect!

23# ‘Mini Me’ Syndrome

Whenever and wherever you can, just talk about yourself, ignore the people who shut off and walk away, they don’t matter.  You are the most important person in your world, they have to realise that!

24# Ignore All Feedback

If people have anything to say to you, let them try! After all, your perfect, there is nothing wrong with you. Don’t concern yourself with feedback and the opportunity to amend your behaviours, what do they know?

25# Controlling Behaviour

If you can be a control freak, even better.  Where possible try and control everyone and everything.  You’re the ‘boss’, it’s your way or no way.  Comprising is out and never let anyone tell you there is a better solutuon.

26# Try Not to Listen

Talk all the time, listening too much can help you to grow, you don’t want that do you? You have loads to say, just say it, feel free to finish the sentences of others and jump to conclusions, there’s nothing you’ve not heard before.

27# You Do Know It All

You do, you need not learn any more, there is nothing else left for someone to teach you. You are an expert in everything.  Look, you know best, sure you do, just jump at any chance to pass on your knowledge and wisdom to others, the room won’t have anyone in it as great as you!

28# Persistence

Who cares how many times it took Edison to invent the light bulb, seriously, who cares? If it doesn’t happen the first you try, it’s not going to work, so stop doing it and do something you can do.

29# Publicly Humiliate Others

This one is best saved for large groups when the person is there, or small ‘cosy’ groups when they aren’t.  Either use sarcasm or aim the jokes at them, or gossip behind their back, share information that was confidential –  it’s humilation at it’s best, enjoy.  No-one will be doing it to you behind your back!

30# Over Do It

Take everything to excess. And even better things that make you unwell and unhealthy: eating, smoking, drinking, lack of sleep. Your body can cope with the pressure.

31# Stop at Challenges and Obstacles

That’s it just stop.  They are there for a reason, take the hint!

32# Decide Nothing

If you have to choose or decide, try not to.  Wait a while, better still, let others make decisions for you! Why would you want to accept the responsibility of any decIsion you make? Goodness you could even make the wrong one, what then?

33# It’s Too Late

It probably is. Look if you’re thinking it, chances are you’ve missed all the opportunities and chances coming your way.  There aren’t going to be anymore, so accept it. You’ve had your time.

34# Live In Fear

Whatever it is, it will become real anyway.  How can it not?  Please don’t try and conquer any fear, you have no idea what’s on the other side.  No, stay safe and live with the fear, much more rewarding.

35# Lack of Trust

Trust no-one, everyone is out to ‘get you’.  Break all trust with the people you know, you’ll be hurt in the end.

36# Slap Forgiveness in The Face

If someone has done you wrong, never forgive.  It’s a sign of weakness and you never want to be seen as a ‘pushover’.

37# Procrastination

We’ll get back to you on this one!

38# Wishing Away Time

Long for your holidays, big events, happy times. It’s okay to think ‘well, in 8 weeks I’ll be lying on a beach in…’ the eight weeks inbetween, they are irrelevant and you don’t need to think about them, just wait for time to pass.

39# Superman/Superwoman

Be all and everything to everyone.  Ignore yourself and your own needs, never say no and never let anyone ‘down’ – they’ll hate you for it!

40# Broken Promises

Never, ever, keep a promise.  Keeping promises is for people who care about others, promises are meant to be broken remember?

41# Nosey Parker

Stick your nose into everyone else’s business as much as you can.  You can gather information to use to humiliate others, people will always love your opinion, even if they don’t ask for it, give it anyway!

42# Whining, Whinging, Wallowing

These are great qualities and as much as people say that they annoy them, they don’t. When carrying them out as an activity remember to throw in as much self-pity as possible, folks love that and they are sure to take notice!

43# Everyone Cares About You The Same As You Care About You

You are number 1! No doubt about it, the world obviously moves around you.  You are the centre of the universe. It’s only ‘right’ that others think so too.

44# Think Small, Live Smaller

Big things only happen to others, remarkable only happens to ‘them’, awesome is something that is reserved for the minority.  Don’t be disappointed, think tiny for you.

45# Close Your Mind to New Experiences

You’ve seen it all, done it all before! There is nothing that is going to excite you or make you sit up and take notice.  If anyone suggests anything to you, cut them off at source, you’ll be very disappointed, new doesn’t mean better!

46# Live in Comfort With ‘I Can’t’, ‘If only…’, ‘Yeah, but’

So what?  If you can’t, you can’t.  Why try?  Why risk the journey of actually realising you can do something?  You might fail! No, stick with what you can do now, leave others to try new things, let them be the ones to risk!

47# Be Rescued and Saved

Let others rescue and save you.  It’s so much quicker than trying to sort things in your own head.  Let them come and rescue from your emotional angst and torment, you have no need to grow or learn from any experience.

48# Jealousy

GO Green! If someone is doing better than you, never ever wish them well, ignore them, cut them out your life, find ways to punish them and bring them down a peg or two, that’ll teach ’em.

49# Believe Everyone Loves and Likes You

Yes they do, oh yes they do! Assume nothing less.  You’re a likeable lovable soul! There must be something wrong with them if they don’t. Don’t think you have to build a relationship – they should always ‘get’ you first meeting.

50# Finished Education

You spent years at school, and they taught you everything you need to know.  There comes a point when learning is done.  Know need to learn anymore, nothing no one else can teach you.  Dismiss any opportunity to learn and grow. You’re done.

51# Stick With The Crowd

The crowd knows best.  Why on earth do people want to ‘do there own thing’ anyway?  Why on earth would ‘being an individual’ actually work? To move away from the crowd takes courage, guts and a risk…do you really want the hassle of being the ‘oddity’?

52# Hide The ‘Real’ You

Never let anyone see the ‘real’ you, you have faults, deep rooted habits, beliefs and thoughts but to let people ‘in’ and expose the ‘inner’ working of your mind is a clear road to disaster.

53# Don’t Keep Appointments

Never turn up on time or where you promised you said you would be.  It will show a lack of respect for yourself and other(s) but it’s irrelevant, they won’t bother so neither should you!

54# Use Others For Personal Gain

They have feelings, but ignore this point.  Use people, they won’t notice, never think you have to give anything in return. If they are so gullible, it’s not your fault.

55# Ignore LIFE

Forget the fact that it’s happening now, and this it.  It’s too much to think about, best not concern yourself with what it’s meant to be for you.

56# The Glass IS Half Empty

Optimism is just silly.  It’s for people who have lost touch with reality. Don’t be fooled by them, the worst always happens!

57# Lack Creativity

If you haven’t figured out a solution to a problem the first time you think about it, that chances are there isn’t one. Don’t think to hard, any possibilities will just be stupid ideas.

58#  Stay in Your Comfort Zones

They are there for a reason, they keep you safe! You probably have a small comfort area, that’s okay, less space to travel out of them.  Stick with what you know, in the long run you won’t be scared or disappointed!

59# Never Plan

It’ll never happen anyway…adopting the ‘see how it all unfolds’ or ‘what’s for you, won’t go past you’ is an ideal mindset.  Plans are meant to broken, they never last, heck, you could be run over by a bus tomorrow, no the future does not concern you.

60# Leave Silence Well Alone

Never sit and be quiet, who knows what could happen! You may find a little peace or think about ‘things’ you don’t want to think about.  Keep busy, fill your head at all times with other ‘stuff’!

61# Seek Revenge

If anyone does you wrong, seek revenge on the culprit.  This ‘turning away’ is for pussies, they did you wrong, so do exactly the same back.  It’ll not hurt you anymore!

62# Live a Stressful Life

Let others find peace and tranquillity; fill your life with stressful moments.  They do keep you motivated and everyone works best under stress!

63# Don’t Listen to Others

Let everyone know your story – your pain, hardships, problems, issues – they are probably incredibly interesting to you, spread the word, no one will ever wait for you to say ‘how are you?’

64# Never Follow Your Heart

You’re doomed if you do! Give up dreams, leave them alone.  You’re not able to make decisions based on what your heart tells you, you have to live your like for a long time to come, do what’s always in your head and ‘real’!

65# You Don’t Have Any Power

You don’t, there is never away out of hard, tricky situations or feelings of loathing! Maybe some people ‘do’ find a way, but that means having to ask for help!