Moxie Business: Creative & Courageous Business

Evaluate and Review Your Goals

January 23 Dawn

If you’ve worked on the planning and preparation, you’ll have set yourself some timelines of when you want your goal (including the smaller goals) to be completed.

Obviously, you may never think you have to review, especially if you can see and feel your goals working.

But what if you don’t? And what if the deadline comes and goes, and the goal is not achieved?

I would like to suggest to you that you evaluate and review your goals on a regular basis, at least once a week.

Not Seeing the Results?

This can be demotivating or the point where some say ‘what’s the use, nothing is happening‘.

Assuming that you are taking action, 100% committed and have not ‘sold up’, this would be a great time for a review.

Also, you may not see the results right away.

There is a great book title called ‘You’ll See It When You Believe It, Or You’ll Believe It When You See It’. We can get hung up on the not seeing, I know many of us want concrete evidence that all the action we are taking is worth it, but life isn’t like that.

Why Review and Evalute?

Sometimes you’ll notice small results, but not as much as you’d like so you need to tweak your plans slightly to adjust the outcome. Or you’ll figure out that changing your approach on one simple thing will explode your results like crazy!

Evaluation is a worthwhile activity because it can help keep you honest about your efforts, it can reveal holes in your plans and it can inspire you to keep going when you notice even moderate results happening.

There are two types of evaluation you should do periodically. The first involves frequent evaluation of your daily actions.

Try Not to Leave Them Hanging

Commitment at the time when you aren’t seeing results is crucial. Where it may seem easier to ‘put them aside and forget’, this is time when you need to have that accountability ‘chat’ with yourself. Or find someone who you can talk to. Someone who is rooting for you, they may be able to offer another perspective, or help you with ideas.

Leaving them hanging because it’s getting ‘tuff, is such a waste (in my opinion). You could be one action away from a breakthrough.

Every one to two weeks, take a few moments to answer these questions with honesty:

Are you sticking to the plan?
How can your plan be improved?
Have you needed to use Plan B?
If so, how did that work out for you?
Where can you improve on your orginal plan?
Do you need to modify anywhere?
If so, are they working better for you?
Have your results met your expectations so far?
If not, why not?
What can you do to improve your results (go back to the orginal who, why, where, when, how, can you add to it?)

The other type of evaluation can be done monthly or even quarterly; and it should focus more on your long-term progress rather than your daily actions.

Answer these questions:

Are your plans moving you in the right direction?
Is your ultimate goal still the same, or are you considering a change in direction?
Can you think of any ways to improve upon your original plans?
What are you learning about yourself through this process?
Have you developed a stronger appreciation of any aspect of yourself?
Which of your qualities and habits still need improvement?
How can you begin to expand your potential and stretch your limits?
Are you beginning to think of even larger goals you can achieve now?

Goal Setting – Get Really, Really Specific

January 22 Dawn

We could begin with the ‘same old same old’ question, what do you want?

Yawn!

Isn’t that question a nightmare to answer?

Beegeezoh, most of us can’t even think about what to have for tea most nights.

Yet, folks claim they want a better job, better car, nicer house, more loving relationships, life of no stress, happier children, better sex, more money, greater freedom, a lovely garden, house in the country…yada yada yada.

And there is a problem with the vague statements. Em, they’re too vague!

Vague – Adjective

Definition: not clear, not expressed or explicitly stated. Not known established, confirmed or determined, not enough thought or understanding

So vague goals may look something like this:

‘I’d like to lose a bit weight’
‘I fancy a new career’
‘I want to go back to college’
‘I’d like more money’

We’d never ask an estate agent, ‘Find me house please’, we probably wouldn’t arrive at Mickey D’s drive through and say, ‘I’ll have food’, or go into a libary and ask ‘May I have any book to borrow?’

So what about this getting specific.

Complete opposite to vague, it means setting goals that are exact, defined, concrete, definite, fixed, with 100% certainty.

And to do this really easily, we need to ask specific questions of ourselves…

What do I want specifically
Where do I want it specifically
How will I get it specifically
Who (if others are involved or affected) do I need specifically
When do I want it by specifically
Why do I want specifically

Here they are in detail:

What: this should identify the “meat” of your goal. What you want to accomplish?

Where: location, if applicable (like getting a job in your local area or moving to a new area).

How: you may have a preference as to “how” events will unfold (this may not always be within your control, but a having a general expectation is good).

Whom: if your goals involve others, you’ll want to highlight your expectations.

When: a general timeline for the fulfillment of your goals.

Why: your reasons for wanting to achieve your goals.

Move Towards Pleasure or Away From Pain

Most people have a preference to one of the above.

However in goal setting, especially for motivation, it becomes easier if you can focus on the benefits of achieving your goal, rather than the focus being on what you don’t want or giving up. (That’s important that line, because it’s in bold and underlined!)

For example, assume you wanted to lose weight. This goal is ‘technically’ simple (if we weren’t human!), you eat healthy, in proportions that aren’t excessive and exercise to reduce and maintain the weight.

Yeah, easy, however we ‘fail’ more often than succeed because we feel we are ‘giving up’ the food we love, or think we’ll miss the biscuits and treats, or how will we live without certain foods, ‘course we aren’t going to feel that pain!

Giving up is painful. Focus on the Gains.

The truth is though, we never have to give anything up.

Taking the weight example above: In proportions that aren’t excessive doesn’t mean give up, if you have 2 bags of crisps a day, can you make the goal specific to reduce it to one? Or one every other day? You’ll get to the same result but obviously you’ll have to calculate your timescales appropriately.

Another example could be ‘I want more money’, again vague and non specific.

Making it specific may read ‘I want to have £10,ooo savings by the end of the year so that (benefit) I can afford to reduce my hours at work for a year and return to college one day a week. This will give me the qualification I need to change careers in two years time. By changing careers I’ll be able to spend more time with my family and free up time to pursue a part time business’

Key Point: Make The ‘What Do I Want’ Specific and With The Benefit

Clarity is vital, another reason vague doesn’t work is because it’s non emotive, the desire and motivation is pretty weak. And remember most give up their goals because they aren’t motivated enough to achieve them.

Plus vague is wishy washy, and confusing. You may forget what you are trying to achieve and get all confused and disappointed at the time it’s taking.

If you’re having trouble figuring out what you want, take the time to find out.

A few ideas…

Losing weight: most people don’t want to just lose weight. For some they want to feel good in their goals, feel sexy when making love, be able to wear a bikini, show their legs in a pair of shorts. For some they may want to lose weight to run a marathon or complete a life long challenge.

Building confidence: for some they want the confidence to speak in public and not feel shame, or go out on a night out and not feel like the ‘spare’ part or wall flower. Perhaps they want to change career or tell folk what they really think.

Stay open and dig deep. Keep asking yourself ‘what would that give me’ and repeat until you get to the core of why you want to set the goal in the first place.

Think about every area of your life and ask yourself what you would change if you could.

What would you add to your life, and what would you remove?

Once you are crystal clear about what you want to accomplish, put it into a neat, concise statement:

I want to achieve _________ [what]
at _________ [where]
by __________ [how]
by __________ [timeline]
with _________[other persons]
because ____________ [why].

Day 4 Invent Where’s Your Life At?

December 4 Dawn

We talk about ‘crossroads in life’: the paths, the journey, the direction headed – how can you know where you are heading if you don’t know you’re starting point?

Think about it, you would never be able to plan a journey from A-B, without first knowing the destination of A!

Nowhere is this more visible in the questions ‘what do I want to be paid for?’. Many don’t know their current strengths, skills, weaknesses, knowledge, information, expertise, abilities, passions and goals. How do you know which direction to take, until you know the current surroundings?

How do you discover where you are now?

Here’s a few questions that can help you figure out where you’re at:

What motivates you the most? (NOT what do you like, what DRIVES you, what MUST you inclide in your life?
If you had to make one decision, what would it be?
Describe in detail where you add most value, not what you do.
What does your current reality ‘cost’ you?
What has been your ‘finest hour’ so far? Is it a hint?
What fears keeps you awake at night?
What skills do you KNOW you have, yet others don’t yet?
If you could have a meeting with your ‘future boss’ who, where would it be? (It could be you!)
What do you know, that you excel in and could teach to others?
What opportunities did you let slip? Are they still available?
What do you fear won’t happen for you? Is it enought to drive you forward?

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Day 3 Invent Make a Decision

December 3 Dawn

When working with clients there is one stage of the process that is more painful to work through than others. It’s the stage right before they make the breakthrough they want or the point before the ‘a-ha’ moment.

It would be so much easier to ‘rescue’ and say ‘this is what you need to do next, then this, then this, then that’ (if their answers were obvious), big no, in a ‘typical’ coaching session that is extremely unprofessional and not part of the ethics (direct coaching perfectly okay!) It’s the indecision stage I’m talking about. Not being able to make a decision is PAINFUL experience, it costs you big time…

Make a DECISION: there is so much power in deciding what is best for you. Some people get it all jumbled up with PERHAPS or MAYBE, they are not the same!

The meaning of decision is not ‘choice’.

To make a decision is cutting off and detaching self from all other options. It’s the conclusion to the process of weighing up choices. You take the role of the wig wearing judge and you slam the gavel (judges hammer) down and have the final say.

I’ve had friends who dragged themselves through torment on a daily basis because they could not decide what to do that day, then ended up doing nothing at the end, or dipped into 40 things and at the end day they were so disappointed with the no results.

Imagine a life of the same quality…no decision = no result = ongoing disappointment!

Decision making is extremely empowering. You call the shots, you decide that those other options are not GOOD enough and close them down.

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Social Media Tips for Your Career

November 26 Dawn

Social Media is hot! And in the near future it’s not going to be cooling down: Facebook, Twitter, LinkedIn, You Tube, WordPress…how can they benefit your career?

Facebook alone there are:

More than 550 million active users (and 170 MILLION business pages…that’s important for your career)

50% of users log on to Facebook in any given day

Average user has 130 friends

People spend over 700 billion minutes per month on Facebook!

Leveraging the Power of Social Media for Your Career, is about using all the popular platforms to ensure you’re visable, networking, sharing, building credibility, connecting and creating awareness to the people that you want to matter or otherwise known as marketing and branding yourself!

1. Make sure that you use the privacy settings available – a ‘checking employer’ doesn’t need to see what you got up to last Saturday night!

2. Use Google Alerts or Social Mention to quickly discover the jobs/positions that are available in your field.

3. Set yourself up a blog. What, you? Yes, and blog about the industry you wish to enter. Write a couple of articles about your industry.

4. Ask for introductions or introduce yourself to people you want to connect with. What benefits are there to knowing you?

5. Brand all your pages. Keep the same ‘personality’ on them all.

6. Use the Facebook ‘Friends List’ if needed on Facebook, to ensure your status updates are being seen by the right people.

7. Comment and have conversations with the people you are connected with. It is called social media for a reason.

If you can get to Edinburgh on the 6th December, and you would like help with your career, please accept my invite to a free seminar ‘How to Market Yourself a New Career’ click on the link for full details.

People Will Always Talk: Do It Anyway

October 5 Dawn

E.E. Cummings once said ‘it takes courage to grow up and be who you really are’.

Are you constantly worried about what people say about you?

Do you seek the stamp of approval seal, the permission, the go-ahead nod, the say-so from others, a witness to just to be yourselves?

Scared to say to the world that ‘this is who I really am’?

Is it confidence?

Let’s get going by stating the obvious:

1. There will people that just don’t like you…

What you’re doing, who and what you are, your values and the image you project onto their world.

Do it anyway.

You’re never going to please them, so why the heck are you trying to?

2. Some people will always love you.

Care for you and wish you success in whatever you do.

They’ll root for you, be your biggest cheerleaders no matter what.

Do it anyway.

3. And now brace yourself for the not so obvious (it may hurt a little)

There will be a handful of people who you think are a Number 2 above but are in fact a Number 1.

They are waiting, willing and wanting for you to fall on your arse.

And the more visible you make yourself at stepping away from their version of normal, their view of their world or their comfort zones, the more they will talk.

Do it anyway.

You may never know who they are.

There is no way you’ll please everyone. In life you can sit back and wait until you have the approval of everyone around you before you can make a change: it’s not coming.
You can give up your right to live authentically and honestly, so that you never become the topic of conversation: what a waste.
You can trim yourself back and keep parts of you hidden, but you’ll kill all that is special about you.
You can continue to stifle yourself, your creativity, your dreams, your plans, your wishes and passions.

Or, you can say ‘screw it’, get yourself buckled up and drive off in the other direction.

Will you leave some people standing?

Probably.

Will some people be sitting waiting for you to return and fill you with ‘I told you so’. Maybe.

Only you can make the decision to never be held in an imaginary prison created for you by other people’s opinions.

A Lesson From Bond, James Bond

Sean Connery is from Edinburgh, my hometown.

When ‘Msh Moneypenny Connery’ is out of town and making the headlines folks say ‘I remember him when he was just a milkman, who does he think he is now’ and when he’s in town they are lining the streets to touch and congratulate the man. See, Number 3’s!

Do you think for one second Connery worries and concerns himself with the people who are bitter about his success and former career as a milkman? Em, no!

Okay, maybe Connery is not a great example, here’s another:

A woman wants to return to work and with little formal education she attends a training program, as each day passes she learns something new about herself.

She comes to a decision that her current life is not the same one she wants for her future.

So she makes changes.

She no longer wants to go to the same places, do the same things, keep the same company and maintain certain friendships.

People in her life who are content and happy with the ‘way she is’ begin to struggle and can’t understand it when the current comfort zone (they both existed in for so long) is no longer good enough for her.

So the relationship changes, a distance is created.

She becomes the ‘outsider’.

Now some of her once ‘well wishers’ need to know that they are right for not having stepped out from the ‘norm’, so they begin to create alliances with the rest of the pack.

They meet, they discuss, they talk about the outsider, forgetting in their berating and belittling that they once connected and shared.

They now look forward to the day she falls on her face.

The Do It Anyway Lessons

1. People will always talk. Always. There is no doubt in my mind that when I have just ten minutes breathe left inside me, I won’t be thinking about all the people I didn’t please.

How about you?

Give yourself one good reason why they should matter now.

2. I may however be full of regret of what I didn’t manage to squeeze in.

What comfort zones are you currently living in that you know are no longer good enough for you?

What will happen if you stay there?

3. Many people (in my experience) are terrified of stepping away and out from the safety of a ‘closed’ group. So they remain static, however the longer you try and please everyone, all the time, the longer you are moving further and further away from who the hell you are.

Have you seen the film Educating Rita (the scene in the bar), get your hands on a copy and watch.

4. To remain in a comfort zone that no longer fits you will crush your passion, motivation, integrity and authenticity.

What are currently putting off because of the fear people may talk?

5. Do It Anyway.

Dr Seuss quote sums this up,“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”

6. If you do fall, it’s 99% certain you are going to fall forward not back, get up, keeping moving, ignore the naysayers.

7. The stamp of approval seal…you need no permission. Ever.

Get yourself out of the waiting room of life, people remain in there all their years, waiting on the all clear to be themselves.

It will never happen, that call you’re waiting on is only one you can make to yourself.

I thought I would end with a poem, it’s not mine it’s written by a lady called Agnes.

I didn’t know her personally and her life was received with a positive and negative reception, just like yours and mine.

But whatever people said, her critics and supporters, her life was definitely ‘I did it anyway’…

Mother Teresa’s Anyway Poem

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self entered; Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true enemies; Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you; Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight; Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous; Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow; Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and your God; It was never between you and them anyway.