You will be okay, you'll settle in.

(Many of you have been starting new jobs and careers – this has been up on another site for a few months, I thought I would bring it in here to help you out. Hope it helps, if you have any tips please share them with others, leave a comment below, with love Dawn.)

Congratulations!

You’ve landed your new job, the interview was an astounding success (you definitely impressed a few people with your skills, knowledge and rapport.)

 Well Done You…

 And now has your celebration become one of  intrepidation?

You thought the worry was over, at the moment when they asked ‘please tell us about yourself’, and yet,  here you are now, swapping one fear (the interview) for another: the fear of ‘starting a new job’, all about those first few hours, days, weeks. 

You could be questioning (and perhaps doubting) your skills, your image, your personality, your knowledge and (heck) even asking yourself ‘will people like me, will I fit in, will I be able to do the work?’

I think it’s known as a ‘crisis of confidence!’

 All natural behaviours, but let’s get a handle on this, okay?

Let’s talk about the inside ‘stuff’, the ‘stuff’ that has you worrying, those little self doubts that just might keep you awake the night before your first day! 

What If The Job Is Different To What You Imagined?

Imagine you begin and the job is not exactly what you ‘thought’ it was (from the job description and application form), what do you do? 

No matter how hard HR departments and Managers try to accurately state what the role is, they may not work ‘at the front line’ and there could be discrepancies.

What do you do?

a) Leave (at lunch time the first morning, don’t laugh, people do this)

b) Stay a week (and tell yourself that you’ll decide at the weekend)

c) Give it a bit time (and go with the flow)

 No right answer there, oh, and in my past I have chosen ALL options, being the wise old soul that I am, I would say option c is the best solution, giving it time. Yes, you may be asking yourself question such as:

How Will I Fit In? 

One of the biggest ‘fears’ or ‘worries’ when starting a new job for many can be the question ‘will people like me and will I fit in’…the short answer to that is:

Yes! (If you are likeable and you want to fit in), but that’s too vague.  

Here’s the thing…you are technically the ‘newbie’ and some people will be a lot more welcoming than others (that doesn’t necessarily mean they like or dislike you.) 

If you are entering a well-established team, remember they have already ‘formed’: roles, personalities, reputations, hierarchies (whether spoken or not) and in that team some people will get on really well. 

As the new person, you are not just starting a new ‘job’ with ‘new’ tasks and responsibilities you are entering a well established community or social group.  And even if they haven’t got them written down, they WILL have ‘norms’ and ‘rules’ they follow.

And…no one will probably be able to tell you them.

Why? 

Because they don’t actually know them either or that they exists! Yet, they do, they are very real.  And being the new person it can be ‘uncertain times ahead’ when you are trying to follow guidelines and ‘rules’ you don’t know…and what feelings come with uncertainty? 

Nervousness and doubt. 

Take heart – you will ‘learn’ them in time, and yes, you will become part of the community and you will eventually have your say at writing the new ‘Unspoken Rules Guidebook’ for your new workplace.

But say you notice things happening that shouldn’t be, then what? 

What if you witness bad practices? People only working when a boss is around? People bitching about others? People covering mistakes?  People deliberately sabotaging the work of another?

If you say decide to say something, will you become the outcast?

What then?

What? You want my advice? Okay…

Well, for what is worth, every workplace is different and of course it depends on your values.  Don’t get me wrong I have worked with people who’s only goal in a team was create to havoc: they ‘waltzed’ into their new role and assumed  (no demanded) respect, authority and trust immediately – they never lasted in the job long, as they haven’t learnt that they are in a ‘new role’ as the new person and like all social groups (they have to earn it first). 

And that takes time.  And these same people will HATE every new place until they learn this.

Yet it can be accelerated.

How?

Here’s a few tips:

1. You can prepare yourself mentally of how you want to be in your new role…you can think about your attitude, image, and communication skills.  Yet you obviously can’t prepare others.
2. Be who you are. You were hired on the value you can bring.  
3. If you were to start a new role ‘pretending’ (because you want people to like and love you) you will probably not be able to maintain that behaviour very long.
4. Read and understand more on social groups, the way groups form and social roles. 
5. Time – even a new member of staff starting work (to the existing staff) is CHANGE and not a lot of people like change.  It’s not personal. 
6. You are ‘fresh’ remember, like a new born baby you are not clouded or have any preconceived notions or ideas.  So allow time to get to know everyone, make up your own mind instead of listening to the ‘this is what they are like’ stories from other people.
7. Being the newbie – just because the label is on you, it doesn’t mean to say you have to ‘shut up and go along with everything’ and it doesn’t mean you don’t have to say anything at all.
8. Praise Yourself – this may seem a little whacko, but here’s what I mean.  You may be a person that needs to ‘hear’ you are doing a good job – you need it.  However, you may not get it in your new workplace.  I’m not saying you need all the compliments under the sun, you just need to know if what you are doing is the right thing.  Your new workplace might not be like that…one of unspoken ‘rules’ of the group might be ‘we just get on with it’.  Learn how to compliment yourself – don’t wait for the external world to tell you.
9. If your nervous, it will pass.  As you entering a new situation you may feel uncomfortable I mean it’s not just a new job it’s: new people, policies, environment, politics, community – go with the flow.  A good team will help with your transition (and yes there may be the odd bugger who does nothing to help you ) each moment will be come easier.
10. Ask for support and supervision.  What if they don’t offer it? Suggest it?.  In fact (it’s probably too late), it’s a very good interview question.    Work is a place for forming friendships and long lasting relationships (most couples meet through a working environment) yet at the end of the day it is work…you don’t have to sell your soul and divulge your deepest darkest secrets (you do that with friends). 

Your goal is to work effectively with other people, some you will find this easy with, others not so well.  As long as the service and role you are carrying out is not affected then fine.

If you make a mistake – admit to it.  Easier than said than done? Back to the staff team, if they are supportive they will accept the error and you can move on from it. 

Learn about emotional intelligence and enhanced communication skills…there are some people that could not give a rats tail about how their behaviour effects others (oh and there are some that are the emotional baggage handlers) strike your balance.

It’s strange (in my experience working with career changers) most people love the first two weeks to a month…it’s new, exciting, challenging, relationships and bonds are being formed all over the place.

Then when this ‘time’ has passed, people settle, become more comfortable and then can ‘see’ faults and areas of the new job they are not happy with.  This is the test.  The first stage is a ‘honeymoon’ period, if there is one tip I could give you (right now) for this time it would be this… 

The real rewards come when you have all the information…starting a new job is fantastic but nothing compared to the rewards an effective working team can achieve.

Be you, be calm, listen, be open, be aware all new experiences, take time to learn.

Copyright Dawn Barclay 2009-2010

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Dawn Barclay is the owner of Potential Developments and publishes her newsletter for individuals seeking tools, resources and support to develop and realise their personal and professional potential. You can visit the main Potential Development site at http://potentialdevelopments.co.uk