Speaking in Public – What Does Your Audience Really Want?

Have you ever lost the will to live during a presentation?

I have.

Today.

‘They’ say speaking in public is a number 1 fear, I disagree, I think it’s an urban legend.

First, if it scares the heebie-jeebies out of you, where did you learn that? From your own experiences, or through tales of horror from individuals who bombed on the podium?

Is the true fear vulnerability, judgement, being exposed, being the centre of attention, the fear that something may happen that you can’t control?

I’ve seen people terrified to the point of throwing up, get up, speak and rock their message.

I’ve also (today) witnessed professional public speakers (confident and fearfree) make a complete stinky old hash of it.

It doesn’t matter if the audience is 1 person, 5, 10, 500 everyone can learn to:

Connect with the audience
Lead the audience
Acknowledge the audience
Be in ‘flow’ with the audience
Pace the audience
Feel the audience
Help the audience
Share with the audience
Be real with the audience
Be truthful with the audience
Include the audience
Let the audience participate
Build rapport with audience

It’s not difficult to master.

It’s about getting out your own head and into the head of another human being(s): you’re presenting to a brain, an emotional brain, emotions that create different ‘states of mind’ every moment of the day.

Today. Ugh.

Sitting through talks from the:

The Self Proclaimed Expert

For them a message…

“Dear you, I don’t care if you’re an expert in something really awesome, if you don’t give a tosh about your audience, and care more about belittling the ‘techie’ person who couldn’t get your laptop to connect to a projector, and to do it in front of a room of 300 peeps, shame on you.

Yeah, you got through your content eventually, but your goal of displaying your authority meant you lost your audience.

Remember that person who asked you a genuine question, they were ‘stuck’, not heckling, instead of saying ‘Is anyone else not getting it, or is it just my good friend at the front?‘, you could’ve acknowledged their fears, and said you didn’t have the answer (it was obvious you didn’t), oh, but that would have blown your ‘expert’ cover huh?’

(Gosh, even writing that, it’s made me more mad. You were rude and obnoxious. There. Said it.)

The ‘Go Out On High’ End of Day Speaker

A message for them…

“Dear you, your first words after you ran onto the podium of ‘Stand Up, Let’s Connect, Let’s Move!‘, and then leading us into a dance to the notes of James Browns ‘I Feel Good‘ followed by the instructions of ‘massage the person in front you’, didn’t cut it.

Heard of pacing and leading? I know that works for the man with the headpiece and great knashers, sorry, teeth (Tony Robbins), but this was a different audience.

Were you in the hall before your slot?

Or did you just pitch up 10 minutes before ?

Did you see the state that everyone was in?

Were the folded arms, sighs, fidgeting, heads to the side, crossed legs and the severe lack of eye contact with you not enough of a hint?

You missed such an opportunity.

And funny, (you being a renowned world class motivational speaker, according to the brochure) I would’ve thought that you of all people would’ve been clued up on noticing human behaviour and what peeps were feeling.

When giving a presentation your audience is asking:

Has this person got something interesting to say?
Why should I give them my attention?
Why should I listen to them?
What’s in it for me?
Do I feel safe?

Most people plan their content, not why their content matters.

They don’t even consider answering questions about their audience or listener such as:

Who are they?
What’s in it for them?
What state of mind are they in?
How do I want them to feel at the end?
Why should they listen to me, what benefit is there?
What can I tell them to ease their pains or add benefit to their life?

Today the ‘expert’ speaker didn’t need his PowerPoint. If he had stood up there and said ‘It looks technical parts are playing, it doesn’t matter, let’s have questions and answers instead. I was going to talk about…what three things would you like to know more on’. It would’ve worked.

Some would say that takes a lot of courage. No, it means knowing your message inside out, and being comfortable with the all the ways it can be delivered, that takes passion about your subject.

Today, these two speakers managed to alienate a room.

As a speaker you cannot possible know the states of mind of every person in front of you, but we both know (because we have experienced it ourselves) that a positive state of mind is more productive than a negative one.

There’s a great saying there are no unresourceful learners, only unresourceful states.

So consider these questions before you even think content and planning:

What state would I like to lead my listeners into?
What state would I like to induce and maintain?
What states may be present before I start?
If positive, how can I maintain it?
If negative, can I change it?

Here’s a few more points from today:

For Speaker 1: you didn’t need to execute or display your authority, we were your audience, we gave you power automatically by coming to hear you speak.

You had personal power, all you needed to do was connect with us.

You could’ve included us in your ‘techie’ mishaps if you knew anything about building rapport.

We would’ve helped you.We wanted to. We felt for you.

You didn’t even acknowledge we were there and you missed a perfect opportunity to show real humanity and connection.

Lesson: The thing about (most) audiences is they are on your side at the beginning, one of your tasks is to make that bond stronger: connect, share, be honest, be human, let us in and participate with you.

For Speaker 2: I do appreciate you were at least were aware that movement is crucial in any learning environment, it could’ve worked but you didn’t let your audience know they were safe, first.

If you’d said ‘I realise you’ve been sitting for a long time (I would’ve thought ‘oh thank you, thank you, I need to move’), how about we move a little (me: ‘you read my mind, awesome’) and then spend a couple of minutes hanging out with the people next to you, sharing what you want from this session (me: ‘a chance to speak, wow, at last’), would that be okay? I know I can’t sit for longer than 20 minutes (me: ‘you feel my pain, you know me!‘) I get ants in my pants.’

Lesson: you will lose your audience if you do or say something that makes them feel unsafe.

What does your audience really want?

It’s basic: respected, connected, cared for, safe and included. That’s for starters. No, feck it, that’s the start it has to begin there.

I need more time to process today, if you fear public speaking, what specifically do you fear the most?

Photo Credit: Flickr Trasiegu