Since Julie passed away, I’ve said a lot, ‘sorry, I’m just having a moment’.
Which is shorthand for, ‘I am completely overwhelmed with emotion right now, my eyes are stinging, my throat is closed, and whatever has just happened in the past 2 seconds has caught me completely off guard and I just want to cry, run away, not make you feel uncomfortable, sorry, it’s a moment, I know it will pass, but this moment is something that I have to go through’.
I’m sure you’ve been ‘in that moment’.
Sometimes it’s grief.
Sometimes it’s stress, heartbreak, exhaustion.
Sometimes it’s love, missing someone, or just the weight of being human.
We say it like a warning. Like an apology. “I’m just having a moment”—as if we’re doing something wrong.
But the truth is: these moments are part of life. They don’t make us weak. They make us real. A friend came to my workplace last week and they happily were talking about the banter they had back and forth with their sister, I ‘had a moment’ , a reminder that Julie and I will banter no more. It was, just a moment.
Moments, they mean something inside us still matters. That we still care. That we’re still connected.
We don’t need to hide that.
So let’s stop treating emotion like a glitch in the effing system. Let’s stop brushing past the quiet pauses, the choked-up words, the tears we pretend not to see or let out.
Instead, let’s notice them. Respect them.
Whether it’s us or someone else—we can learn to say:
“It’s okay. You’re allowed to feel that.”
“I am here for you, during the moment”
And really mean it.
Because “having a moment” isn’t a breakdown.
It’s a breakthrough. Moving through. Moving with.
It’s your heart reminding you that you’re still here, still feeling, still human.
So let’s make that normal. Let’s make this normal.
Being open. Being honest. Taking a breath when we need to.
Let’s stop rushing to be okay and start making room for the in-between.
Have a moment. Take it.
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