Moxie Living: Courage and Confidence

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You’re Not Angry, You Just Need a Hug. Now!

July 29 Dawn

A hug is like a bandage to a hurting wound. ~Author Unknown

Virginia Satir (Psychotherapist) said that you, me, everyone needs:

4 cuddles every single day for survival
8 cuddles a day for maintenance and at least
12 cuddles for growth and development

(But she used hugs, not cuddles.)

How many have you managed to squeeze in today?

How many have you given away?

Did you know that scientists say human touch (including hugs) is essential to the health and well being of your emotional, physical, mental health and development?

Everybody needs a hug. It changes your metabolism. ~Leo Buscaglia

Although part of how this evidence was found by Rene Spitz in the 1930’s and then Harry Haslow 1950’s (link to a youtube video.), would be completely unethical and (I think) bordering sociopathic.

Spitz really went for it, he took two groups of children the first group (30 children) were from an orphanage and they were deprived of any physical contact or touch for the first two years of their life. The second group were given unlimited touch by their mothers.

From the children in the orphanage only 2 could walk and talk.

Haslow (not convinced, obviously, of the findings) did the same experiment with monkeys in the 50’s.

What’s Happened to Genuine Human Touch?

We’re not talking here about sexual contact, or touch that is manipulative, detrimental, abusive or coersive in any way.

I don’t discriminate – I’m an equal-opportunity hugger. ~Author Unknown

Sadly though, is it perhaps those exact acts that have made us wary of the giving and receiving of human touch and contact.

When someone last bumped into you by accident, how did you feel?
Have you ever felt uncomfortable as some touched your arm?
Has the touch of another human being soothed you and comforted you?
Have you shivered and wriggled at an unwelcomed touch or contact?
Have you thought ‘what do they want?’ as someone has placed a genuine touch on your shoulder?

I’m not naive, I know that their are certain circumstances and occupations where human touch is unacceptable.

And I’m not suggesting we all have to start Cuddle Support Groups (although?), or Hug Festivals.

I’m agreeing that the craving for human touch is all of us, it’s a human need. A daily requirement.

Abraham Maslow stated in his Heirarchy of Needs that we all have (Social) Belonging and Love Needs, that we all have the need to give and to receive affection and love, that we have roots, that we belong, that we have intimacy, human contact and warmth.

That we ALL have them. No one is excluded from that.

In the name of science, let’s have a little experiment…

Okay, using a scale of 1 – 10, 10 being ‘scar-eee’ and 1 being ‘perfectly okay’. Are you able to rate the following with honesty?

How would you feel about walking across a hot bed of coals burning at 1200 degrees+ farenheit?

How would you feel about offering and accepting a full scale cuddle with a complete stranger?

Think about it.

Just for a second.

You meet someone for the first time and you touch, getting up close and personal.

Not a quick tap on the back, or one of those ‘rub a dub dub’ up the spine ‘get off me now’ things. No, a full blown cuddle, one that you’d give your best friend, at the airport, before they emigrated across the world.

Or walk on fire.

Here’s the feedback to those two questions above after a real firewalk, during the debrief, always over 85% of the room say that the one interaction with another human being (lasting about 3 seconds) was more scary and frightening than the hot foot across the coals.

Words used have been ‘weird, awkward, out of place, out my comfort zone, embarassed, ashamed’ and a few others: ‘shy, bright red, nervous, weird, uncomfortable’.

Can you relate to that?

How they feel, those beliefs around human contact, interaction and touch are there long before they get into the seminar room.

But the fact is that’s how they feel.

Your Turn

What do you think? Human touch overrated? Needed? Survive without? Please feel free to comment below.

Refuse to Be a Sheeple to Live Your Way

July 27 Dawn

Have you ever veered from the norm?

Scary?

Liberating?

Frightening?

Relief?

Okay, What’s a Sheeple?

A sheeple is someone who threatens their own individuality and rights instead to appeal to authority, the ‘norm’, or accepting the beliefs of others as they are percieved as an authority.

Read that again. It’s wordy.

In brief, people are likened to sheep.

And sheep have a tendenacy to follow one another, or their authority. The sheep ‘authority’ figure or threat being a farmer or nippy little collie, that comes down hard on the ‘soon to be wool’ that trots out of line.

Threatening Your Own Individuality

I make a point of saying to my clients, (even though it may be seen as odd) do not believe anything I say, be skeptical, ask questions, find your own truth, especially when it comes to making decisions about your life.

Why do I say this?

Simple.

Anyone who’s in front of a group, standing next to flipchart, projector, doing the presenting, leading, facilitating is pretty much seen as the ‘authority’, comes with the job — we’re ‘taught’ that behaviour attending school.

Not true. It’s all a perception.

I certainly don’t want anyone to accept what I believe at face value, just to appeal. I want them to remain individuals in a group situation (tough, but do-able.) My role is to help them achieve their goals, and hold the belief that it’s possible.

The need to appeal, conform, obey and ‘fit in’ isn’t new. Remember we’re from tribal roots, our ancestors knew this, they survived by ‘fitting in’, not rocking any boots, or by being a threat to the tribe.

You only need to read the experiments that prove how far we will go so as not to upset the authority. Try Milgrams Obedience Experiment (that’s the one where subjects administered electrical shocks to learners!) for starters.

Is There a Price to Pay?

It takes guts to stand up and ‘leave the groupthink’, to walk away from the expectations of others or question the ‘authority’.

And it comes with a risk. On the one hand you may be hailed a hero or you may be ridiculed.

To be the person on the other side of the fence you may run the risk of people commenting, poking fun, taunting and teasing you.

Is it worth it?

Only you can decide.

Only you will know the consequences of stepping away from the norm and becoming your own authority. You can choose to go with the crowd, you can choose to appeal, you can choose to put the beliefs of others as a higher priority than you’re own and what you believe. Or not.

How to Find Your Own Truth

I’d suggest, question everything, go back to asking ‘but why?’

Who are your ‘authorities’?

Are you still being led by people from your past? Do you stop yourself from carrying out a task or project and think ‘oh what would they think if I did that?’. Do you keep information to yourself, not revealing all the details because you know ‘they’ won’t approve?

Are you not living your life on your terms because of the rules laid down by authority figures when you were, 5, 10, 15 years old?

A few years ago a client I was working shared with me she was sad her parents had passed away, and in some way relieved that she can now start living her life, her way! She was 48. They always judged her decisions.

Did you get taught it was the ‘norm’ to stick with a job you hated?

Were you taught to ‘blend’ in, and not stand out. Were you made to certain items of clothing, did you have to take up ‘hobbies’ and behave in certain ways around certain people.

Was it the norm to hold onto your opinions, ideas and feelings because ‘you had to be seen and not heard’?

Were you taught who were the authority figures you had to obey? Parents, Carers, Teachers, GP’s, religious leaders, anyone with a few letters after their name?

Perhaps you grew up thinking that the TV was the authority, that everything coming at you in pixels was the truth.

Were you encouraged to be your own authority? Were you parents the worst authorities?

Final Thoughts…

I conform, I obey, I groupthink, so am I being a hypocrite?

I follow the rules of the land where I live (authority – police, laws, government). Although I would consider myself to ‘free’ in my thinking, am I?

Are you? Can we truly be free? In one shape or form will we always have to be sheep somewhere?

Do I have the right to ask people to ‘question’? At what point do we give up asking ‘but why?’ and go along with herd.

What do you think? Should we/can we be our own authorities?

PS: Here’s a few quotes :-)

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind. ~Dr. Seuss

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself. ~Friedrich Nietzsche

Before you can break out of prison, you must first realize you’re locked up.

How Are You Smart? Not How Smart Are You?

July 12 Dawn

Do something. If it doesn't work, do something else. No idea is too crazy.

Ever feel that you’re not as smart as others?

Wish you’d ‘stuck in’ more at school?

Have you ever started to learn something new only to give up half way through because you just ‘didn’t get it’?

Think you haven’t had the opportunity (yet) to show what you know you are capable off?

Yes? Then this is for you, it’s not all your fault. (Warning: two swear words ahead.)

Stories are the single most powerful tool in a leaders tool box. ~ Howard Gardner

How Are You Smart?

I’m not saying I’m a complete numpty (scottish-ism), but I don’t think I’m an intelligence genius, if we’re going to go by the Binet-Simon test.

gordon — The Secret of Success? Get Yourself a Puppet!

I remember 4 years ago the nation was tested on the ‘smart’ BBC channel, I had a gathering of finest Scottish minds ;-) at my house, just for a laugh, as you do.

Two hours later, the host, Phillip Schofield confirmed my underlying suspicions that I wasn’t that smart, and I’ll admit it, I didn’t take it lightly from a man who made his fame and fortune talking to a feckin puppet called Gordon the Gopher!

Eventually People Don’t Expect Much

Not being IQ smart has it’s disadvantages you know, after a while people don’t actual expect that much from you.

You no longer get asked what happened to make you get an F, or in my case nil pois when it came to physics, or ‘your sister passed first time, why can’t you‘, really doesn’t kick in the old internal motivation and get the competive streak going.

There is no failure, only feedback

I failed, first time round, most of my ‘O’ Grades, not because I can’t learn, because I didn’t care.

If you don’t know what these are, call someone in the UK over the age 38. In short: they were real exams, none of that ongoing nambeepambee assessment melarkee, in my day, we were real pupils, we had it tough, we had vigilators, we sat in rows at little wooden desks where the graffiti made more sense than answering ‘war can be good, discuss’.

Oh, dearie regarding the ‘ongoing nambeepambee assessment melarkee’ comment — tongue in cheek, I totally agree that ongoing assessment is a good thing, as opposed to building up anxiety, fear and stress to one big exam day.

Actually, I think that’s why some people go through life thinking they ‘aren’t that smart’, because they couldn’t memorize parrot fashion, not because they couldn’t learn.

Em, I just didn’t spend the time memorizing, I think they call that studying. Or is called conforming?

So, I failed all except Home Economics, Modern Studies and Drama, that means. if you want a casserole delivered in a foil tray and an apron made with gingham, or you want me to tell you what a ‘new town’ is, perhaps a wee recital of Queen Margarets speech Henry VI part ii, I’m your gal.

Aside: my parents can provide astounding dish testimonials, always ‘saving it for supper’, after I was in bed so they ‘could enjoy it’. I’m smarter than that, I know and knew full well where it went, bypassing the dog, just in case it had tummy trots, and into the bin. Ah, parents, they sometimes forget how smart their children are, their ditching of the food and ‘cover up’ actually taught me a lot about human behaviour.

They did get passed eventually, and one day they even let me go to the big studying place, that would be university. That experience is an entirely different post!

Smart Learning

Modern Studies, that rocked. Loved it.

Teacher swore like a sinner.

And she made us argue with her, the theories, the books, even each other, telling us ‘to think for ourselves or we’ll get nowhere, don’t believe everything you read in books, school is for learning how to think, not learning how to follow everyone else!’

That’s a smart piece of learning I do remember. (I wonder if she’s still alive, she needs a ‘thank you’ letter!)

Modelling myself on a v-e-r-y responsible adult, I choose her. I like the odd swear, you?

F, C, B words, whatever, love them all.

Folks (parents) hate swearing, ‘it’s not nice Dawn‘ and my mum has mini palpitations and giggles when I mention the word shag, I use it now just to feed my own basic human needs, laughter being the main one.

However, when she was very ill for a long time, I used it deliberately, because it changed her state of mind, the laughter made her forget, even if it was just for a few minutes, that’s pretty smart, no?

I love words. Love them. Just because I sometimes can’t string a sentence together (mainly because my brain is faster than my mouth) doesn’t mean I’d use a swear word instead. Tut.

2+2=4

I dislike maths, just as much as I hate eating meat, and that’s a f**king lot.

Maths, technical, physics were a big thing in our household, mainly because my Dad was good at them.

I always wonder why some parents:

a) force their child to learn what they weren’t good at or

b) force their child to be as good at the subjects they were good at

Any thoughts on that one?

I really wanted to love maths, not just because I enjoyed the squares in the jotters, which were different to the usual lines and produced a very unique doddle, which was great for my visual brain. It blew me away that others could take a pile of letters and turn them into a number.

Sadly, I had Hitlers sidekick teaching me, I spent most of my 4 years in his class, avoiding the flying chalk and blackboard (again ask parents about these) cleaner thing.

I was so busy being scared to actually care ‘if x+y=b, was the value of r?’, in his class I got really smart lesson in ‘learning should be high challenge and no threat’.

But…

Word and Maths Smarties You Have Me in Complete Awe

Number Smarties

There are some really smart people that love math and science, number smarties, you may be one.

I applaud and admire you.

You see, because of people like you, the rest of us get some really cool, neat stuff: things like advancements in medicine, technologies, ipads, digital banking, computers, and soda streams.

You make things, you like to categorise and experiment, I love what you produce.

Word Smarties

And all you people who are passionate about language and blend words together — you’re really smart to me, word smarties, you guys and gals take me to places in my head that I never knew existed, you create imaginary people and situations that excite me and give me stories that I share with others.

You keep me up at night, I’ve refused sex because I’d rather turn a page, and I have row upon row of what you ‘word smarties’ have produced.

How are you smart not how smart are you?

What about you?

How are you smart?

Although words (linguistics) and numbers (logical/mathematical intelligence) are not my strongest. I’d say I’m pretty smart in other ways, like we all are.

Put me in a room where someone is just about to swallow 100 paracetamols because they don’t want to live anymore, or place me in a front of a group where they feel so helpless and worthless, I can do and say smart things to be handed the pills or aid the group on the road to worthwhile and hopeful.

I know what to say to a child when they tell me for the past five years of their life they have been abused by their mother. I know when to push someone and I know when to back off. I can empathise. Share stories and anecdotes, and install a passion for learning.

I’d say that’s smart. It didn’t require me to apply any math either.

Where are you smart?

Seriously, where are you smart? Have you ever thought about what you can do that nobody else can?

Don’t dare say nothing.

Look, although we all can’t play a musical instrument (musical intelligence), dance like Beyonce, Gaga or Pink and play tennis like the Williams sisters (bodily intelligence), you can motivate yourself, you can manage your emotions, have you ever really had a long hard think about what you are really awesome at? Where you really excel?

Multiple Intelligences

It was psychologist Howard Gardner who introduced ‘Frames of Mind The Theory of Multiple Intelligences’ upon the world.

“I believe that the brain has evolved over millions of years to be responsive to different kinds of content in the world. Language content, musical content, spatial content, numerical content, etc.”

Gardner proposed that we all have dominate preferences about learning and intelligence:

He said: people are smarter at different things and no two people learn the same way.

Where you are mega smart, I’m not. And vice versa.

Should You Really Care?

Ah, there’s a question.

My professional opinion would be yes.

Part of my work is helping people with their career, part of finding out where your passion and purpose lies, is very much linked to your preferred intelligence. Gardners work is a theory, he even wrote about never devising a test to measure multiple intelligence.

However, in my little world it does occur in practice.

You would be stunned at the numbers of people that say to me ‘I want a career that makes a difference, one where I can give back and work with people’, they wonder why they have been so unhappy working in finance, banging at keys on a computer for 15 years!

Preference to them (may be) ‘interpersonal intelligence’ and ‘intrapersonal intelligence’.

And others have said the same, only to realise that actually, they don’t like people that much and would prefer to be outdoors (naturalistic intelligence), perhaps working with animals, or involved in an environmental piece of work.

Or imagine you’re learning, and your preferred intelligence is spacial (pictures), and all the materials are words (handouts, powerpoints, books, texts, papers), you may find it difficult to learn. (Which by the way, should be addressed by the teacher or trainer, they should be teaching to all learning styles and preferences.)

Please Care If You Have Children

Do you have children? Do they struggle at school with certain subjects? Although the results may not show it, they may actually be good at maths, however the method in which they are taught may not suit their learning style or intelligence.

Where do they excel, no, where do they get most pleasure? Writing? Telling stories? Drawing. Here’s a great book by Thomas Armstrong if you want to explore this theory and ensure your child leaves school with a passion for lifelong learning. (Order a second hand copy around £1.50)

Food for thought.

I’ll end with this ‘there is no-one who is 100x smarter than anyone else’ – how are YOU smart?

PS: if you go to the collection of books on this site (Amazon store) click on training/inspiring others you’ll see plenty more book recommendations on multiple intelligence.

Buy a Personal Development Book and Make a Barking Difference

July 7 Dawn

Introducing the Personal Development Bookstore!

I’ve eventually got around to doing this.

Here’s the link to the bookstore on this site.

I have a few books, just a couple ;-) and I get asked ‘what do you recommend for…?’

The bookstore includes books on training, accelerated learning, coaching, motivational interviewing, brain stuff and a few others, not just self help or confidence building.

Even if you aren’t looking today remember it’s here, mainly because any commission from any sale through Amazon, the pennies are being given to charity.

And, if you know of one that isn’t there, and it jolly well should be, please feel free to leave a comment below and mention the book and why, ’cause let’s face it, just one persons opinion of what books are good, isn’t enough evidence.

Happy reading!

Visit the Bookstore

Photo Credit: MHal209

Confidence Building The ‘Quick and Easy’ Way (Grrr)

July 7 Dawn

I get emails asking me for advice on how to build confidence and make life changes…quickly and easily.

Here’s my well thought out answer.

I don’t know.

I genuinely don’t know the quickest route.

I have no idea of the easiest path.

I do know a few routes, plenty paths, tools and techniques. But I certainly don’t have the quick and easy, one size fits all answer. Wish I did, I’d bottle it up and pour you a glass.

Making massive life changes isn’t easy, it’s can be really, really, really long work.

I know that’s not perhaps what you wanted to hear, however it’s a lot more rewarding to put in the work and see, feel and notice the results.

Work requires effort, action, stepping out and up.

Faking it, easy.

Covering up, easy.

Pretending, easy.

I’m not into masking the truth or cover up’s, screwing with folks heads, or making large claims that there is no way I can promise and deliver.

I’m actually get really pissed off at those who do.

No wait, that’s unfair and it’s inaccurate, my core gripe is with those couldn’t give a toss about a person, but they do know exactly how to tap into the pain someone is feeling and sell them ‘quick and easy‘.

Example:

Change Your Life in 7 Hours sounds better than Change Your Life, It May Take a Few Months, But You’ll Get There

People want speed, instant, no pain, easy, instant.

Confidence in 10 Minutes or Less sounds better than Ongoing Confidence for The Rest of Your Life, But You’ll Need to Apply This, This and This First

People prefer to only see what’s right ahead of them. 10 minutes is a heck of a lot closer than the rest of your life.

Be Successful Now! sounds better than Become the Person You Choose to Be With a Little Time and Plenty Action

Who wouldn’t be seduced by now as opposed to little time.

Life Transformation and Inspiration sounds better than Turn Your Life Around By Working Really Darn Hard At It

I also detest ‘brainwashing’ personal development, this can include live events where the participants are so fecking tired with the long days, they stop being an individual, and groupthink takes over. Actually this probably happens in every area not just personal development.

I don’t know.

For me, quick and easy, does not neccessarily mean it works and is lasts.

Rant over. I’m sorry I just don’t know.

Do you have any answers? Thoughts? Care to Rant? Tell Me I’m Wrong?

Please feel free to comment below, I’d love your opinion. No dodgy links to £9.97 ebooks with promise of ‘Instant Success Overnight’! I may have to come after you.

Photo Credit (Thank you) shinesforyou

Dog Tricks and The Keys To Personal Success – Seriously, Recruit Your 4 Legged Friend

July 5 Dawn

I’ve been teaching Inca doglet dog tricks, as opposed to cat tricks, ’cause em, she’s a dog!

And she’s making (cough cough) wonderful progress.

Don’t know Inca? Ah. Right. She’s a collie.

She’s a smart collie.

She’s a smart, typical collie.

She’s a smart, typical, highly intelligent collie that requires lots of stimulation, otherwise the socks get it!

She’s that smart!

Aside: I sometimes think in my ‘mindfulness moments’ she’s been sent to me from those ‘higher powers’, so I can learn some deeper ‘zen like’ lessons about patience, understanding and tolerance. If so, the ‘universe’ is having a right old laugh.

Anyhoo…

I bought a book called The Only Dog Tricks Book You’ll Ever Need, and I’m thinking about adding it to one of the ‘Best Self Help/Personal Growth Books Ever’ list, well I would, if I had a list with that title.

I’ve had the book a while and just today flicked through the first few chapters.

Yes, I jumped straight to the tricks — there’s a lesson learned. Between you and me, I actually read the last page of any book first, ever since I watched When Harry Met Sally.

Page 11 has a the title ‘The Keys to Training Success’. I wanted to share them with you because:

a) sometimes we can learn things from the strangest of places

b) they can be completely transferred into our non canine world

c) they make perfect sense

d) it gives me a chance to work through my ‘Inca Issues!’ ;-)

Here goes…

Introduction:

Book says ‘most keys to success are universal, but it helps if you use the ones that fit your personality.’

Light Bulb!

How true is that? How many of us try to develop ourselves using tools that just don’t fit with our personality or learning styles? For example, vision boards over writing goals, or a firewalk over 6 months coaching for breaking through a limiting belief. Same results, different methods.

Do you prefer to learn in groups, 1:1, by listening, seeing, hands on? Do you actually know? What’s your preferred learning style? Visual, auditory or kinesthetic. We learn best when we choose the methods that suits our strongest preference.

Key 1: Be Patient

Book says ‘all dogs learn at different speeds and often don’t grasp concepts as quickly as we think they should. Having patience with your dog will help her success’

Human translation: stop beating yourself up, mentally and emotionally, if you aren’t getting any new learning ‘right’ first time. Be gentle with yourself. Don’t let others dictate where you should be at.

Key 2: Plan Ahead

Book says ‘set your dog up to succeed, if your dog isn’t getting it, the behaviour probably needs to be broken down into smaller steps’

Human translation: all big goals require smaller steps put in place. All little goals completed successfully eventually are the larger sum of the big goals. Your behaviour, the actions you take, what you actually do will determine the final outcome. If something isn’t working, look at your behaviour.

Key 3 Be Realistic

Book says ‘dont expect your dog to perform a behaviour in an environment you haven’t taught him’

Human translation: This is a big a-ha.

Have you ever considered how the environment affects your behaviour, state of mind or emotional well being? It can include your actual physical environment or even the company that you keep. Do you perform better in certain environments than others or with certain people?

A simple life example: as a trainer I’ve been in a few physical spaces to deliver training. If the environment is small, cramped, no natural light, uncomfortable, looks like a training room, I’ll ask for somewhere else. Why? Because the environment will affect the states of any participants. If the environment screams ‘sad, unclean, cold, unwelcoming’, no way will that be a good place to learn anything.

Take a look around today just at your physical environment, is it working for you?

Key 4 Be Kind

Book says ‘use positive methods to teach your dog what is expected of her’

Human translation: Don’t pass through any small success to quickly. Give yourself small rewards. As simple as saying to yourself ‘that was a job well done’ to an actual reward ‘when I achieve this, I’ll take the evening off and…’. You’ll know what you class as a reward.

Give yourself a reason for actually carrying out a task or similar. What will happen when you achieve it?

Key 5 Avoid Punishment:

Book says ‘harsh corrections have no place in the learning phase of your dogs development, instead teach your dog what you want him to do’

Human translation: Wonderful. Love it. What does it mean to you?

End the negative, self destructive and self sabotaging ‘mental chit chat’. There’s no place for it.

Think about this, imagine if you were aware during your most developmental years as a human being. Perhaps the time that included when you were learning to crawl and walk.

Would you give yourself a harsh correction everytime you fell down? No, course not. You just tried again.

And perhaps not as obvious, we are very good at focusing on unwanted behaviour: ‘I musn’t, I shouldn’t, I don’t want, I need to, I have to’ and not focusing in on the behaviour we want. Focus on the desired result ‘I will, I am, I choose to, this time I’ll, I love’, massive difference!

Key 6 Reward Effectively:

Book says ‘reinforce behavior with what motivates your dog a pat on the head is nice, but not necessarily what she wants. remember her paycheck, pay up.

Human translation: What motivates you? Have you ever sat down and worked out what drives you? Do you need external rewards or internal? Do you need someone to acknowledge your behaviours and actions or can you do it for yourself?

Key 7 Be Generous:

Book says ‘be generous all new trainers tend to cheat with reward, reward correct responses often and don’t be afraid to reward exceptionally good responses with extra treats, praise, toys and love’

Human translation: Be generous to yourself and others. Give to yourself freely with no guilt. Give to others expecting nothing in return. And the biggest learning is ‘don’t be afraid’. Don’t be afraid to reach out and give freely to another. Don’t be afraid to put someone before yourself just for a time. Don’t be afraid to offer someone what they need, regardless of who they are.

Key 8 Set Goals

Book says ‘if you dont know where you are going and have not planned out the session, how will you know when your dog’s got it’

Human translation: well, what can I say. Key 8 doesn’t need another explanation. If you don’t know where you’re heading, how on earth will you knoe you’ve arrived. The next stage is to goal set through.

Key 9 Practice Often:

Book says ‘often teach your dog in short, frequent sessions’

Human translation: How often do you ‘give up’ on a goal, plan, idea because things aren’t going exactly the way you planned?

Do you try to cram in too much, too soon? Are you an information sponge, yet, never apply what you read and learn? Our brains need ‘downtime’, the need to be able to process new information, we need to fit the new learning into what our current experience of the world is.

Key 10 Stay Positive

Book says ‘quit with your dog wanting more an enthusiastic student is always eager to learn’

Human translation: As a trainer, one of my mottos is ‘leave a learner wanting to find out more’. I love when a learner or client ‘quits’. The day when they have passed through everything I have to share and they move on to something or someone else, as they are the best person for next part of the learning journey, that can only be a good thing.

As the saying goes ‘A teacher is one who makes himself progressively unnecessary’ Thomas Carruthers

Do you push yourself so hard only to lose enthusiasm and the vision of your goal?

Isn’t it funny, how sometimes learning can come from the strangest of places. I mean a dog tricks book? Eyes open, the answers are there!

Your Turn…

Have you ever learned anything from somewhere, somebody or something you least expected to? Feel free to share in the comments below. OR, what have your pets taught you?